Life, Rebirth, And Evolution.

christinamariehollis: The worst type of crying is when your lips start to shake and tears build up...

Fri, 15 Jul 2011 22:28:04 -0400

The worst type of crying is when your lips start to shake and tears build up quickly and fall fast. You’re bent over or crouched trying to suck it in and not make any noise, but it hurts too much to hold it in. So you let out a yelp and a cry. Then comes the loss of breath, which sucks because not only are you crying out loud but you think you sound dumb for not breathing too. It’s just a mess.

Relevant.

I am so tired of this. I am scared, I am not ready. I do not want to do this anymore.

I just needed to get this out. I’m glad no one reads this blog anymore. It’s been two...

Sat, 09 Jul 2011 21:06:56 -0400

I just needed to get this out. I’m glad no one reads this blog anymore.

It’s been two hours since this panic attack started and I’m almost finally calmed down. I watched my sister vomit into her hands earlier and just walked the fuck out of the house. I have an extreme (cannot stress that enough) fear of vomiting and I just started panicking. My heart was racing, I couldn’t keep still or stop shaking. I felt so nauseated, I couldn’t swallow, and the the room was spinning. I just wanted to be alone, I literally wish I could just go into a coma when these things happen. And for the life of me I could NOT calm down. I’ve dealt with this before when Ian was sick and it wasn’t nearly this bad. Why did this have to happen today?

Probably my worst birthday. Now I’m scared to be even near her. I’m scared to eat, to go to sleep. My eyes are watering so badly. Why can’t I be normal? God help me, please.

They’re all finished and up for sale on my Etsy! Reblog, tell...

Wed, 04 May 2011 19:16:35 -0400

They’re all finished and up for sale on my Etsy! Reblog, tell your friends, buy one, make an order. Look at them here.

Are you excited as I am?

Bianca xoxo

Just started making these :) I’m about to work on an...

Tue, 26 Apr 2011 18:10:07 -0400

Just started making these :)

I’m about to work on an anchor one, and I’ll be taking orders once I order thicker bags. I don’t ever use this tumblr anymore so if you’d like to get in contact with me follow my new one- http://kissmymask.tumblr.com/

Hope all is well!

Photo

Sat, 23 Apr 2011 23:02:57 -0400

All of these are still up for sale on My Etsy. The green one...

Tue, 19 Apr 2011 09:06:40 -0400

All of these are still up for sale on My Etsy. The green one will be up later today for $33. If you message me your zip code I will get you a discount on shipping :)

Please these masks need homes asap!

Bianca xoxo

Do any of you use/have used invisalign instead of braces?

Tue, 12 Apr 2011 15:31:01 -0400

My teeth are crowded (much worse on the bottom then top), I believe I’ll need some teeth pulled- including my wisdom teeth which are now popping through and making my teeth more crowded. Is is just as effective as braces? Or painful? I need to get my teeth fixed, I’m going to be 19 here in a few months.. I should of done this forever ago. I just don’t like the idea, or want metal in my mouth.

We got a dog :) Her name is Macy, and she loves Skylar....

Tue, 29 Mar 2011 21:08:43 -0400

We got a dog :)

Her name is Macy, and she loves Skylar. That’s all that matters to me.

“I have’t had a panic attacks in a few months :)” I fucking jinxed myself. We were...

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 22:32:01 -0400

“I have’t had a panic attacks in a few months :)”

I fucking jinxed myself. We were just driving home from my boyfriend’s friends house, I got into a coughing fit and started panicking, and it just got worse, and worse.

I peaked while we were driving, I though I was going to puke everywhere. I’m feeling a little better now that we’re home, but I’m starting to cough again…fml

Yeah. Its kinda hard. I still want a cigarette after not having one for like almost 5 months, maybe more. You can do it. I believe in you.

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 14:36:48 -0400

Well I have two cigarettes left in my pack, I’m hoping these are my last ones, I told Ian not to buy me anymore no matter how much of a bitch I was to him lol

Thanks Paul!!

My sister and brother in law both smoked for years and years and here is what helped them:
- popping in a piece of gum when they get the urge to smoke
- chewing on a piece of licorice root (to get that satisfaction from having something in your mouth). This worked extremely well for me also. Plus, it tastes good.

- both of them quit cold turkey which they said was easier

- tally up how many packs you buy in a week or a month and multiply it to find out how much money you spend on cigarettes in a year. It's a real eye-opener. So much wasted cash!

Good luck! You can do it!

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 14:35:41 -0400

Yeah I quit cold turkey whenever I found out I was pregnant. I wish I never started again, but shit happens. I will do that, thank you very much! :)

Have any of you quit smoking?

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 11:56:48 -0400

I’m making a promise to myself and my son to quit smoking before his 2nd birthday on July 16th. And to loose the weight, I want to be healthy, and be at my best for my little man. If any of you have any good techniques, ideas, please let me know. This is very important to me.

You are a very brave woman and your son is amazingly handsome! I just watched the video of him standing and it brought tears to my eyes, and I'm a complete stranger! Good job, momma. Stay strong.

Mon, 28 Mar 2011 11:54:23 -0400

Well thank you very much stranger, I really appreciate it :)

Another one done! Go check it out And follow the tumblr for my...

Thu, 24 Mar 2011 14:21:26 -0400

Another one done! Go check it out

And follow the tumblr for my masks!

http://kissmymask.tumblr.com/

My dearest followers, please take a minute to do some good.

Wed, 23 Mar 2011 14:38:00 -0400

Many of my friends, even the closest ones do not know that I had another older brother at one point in time, he was my brother’s Sydney’s twin, and passed away at only two weeks old from SIDS. His name was Ken.

The Halo Sleep sack was designed to help prevent SIDS. Halo was founded by Bill Schmid, who began researching sleeping environments after he lost a daughter to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) in 1991. Since 1994, HALO has worked to develop products that encourage healthier and safer sleeping as well as bring peace of mind to your home.

Please click on the link below and like the page, for every person that clicks it, they will donate $1 to charities to help fight SIDS. It will only take you a minute, or reblog and spread the word.

Ken, you are dearly missed. I wish we could of met and grown up together, I wish you were in my life right now. I love you.

Like it Now.

I’ve been having a really bad morning. I had the same dream again, I was in a bar with a bunch...

Mon, 21 Mar 2011 09:53:00 -0400

I’ve been having a really bad morning. I had the same dream again, I was in a bar with a bunch of marines, probably sometime in the 50’s or 40’s. I was about 35 years old, and Skylar had mental retardation, he couldn’t talk, couldn’t walk, and didn’t have any normality to him whatsoever. I look at him, go outside and start hyperventilating. And I cry so hard, my eyes are literally flowing streams of tears out of my eyes completely soaking me, and starting to flood around me.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me, I woke up again about 5 times last night and couldn’t fall asleep after that. Going for a long walk now, I wish I had something to charge my ipod. No money, no cord.

Okay it’s done. I can’t find my damn clear spray...

Sun, 20 Mar 2011 18:17:28 -0400

Okay it’s done. I can’t find my damn clear spray paint anywhere.

My sister took this, I wish she would of got the entire thing, but it’s okay. It will be up on my etsy in a few days, if you haven’t already go follow/recommend my tumblr for the masks!

http://kissmymask.tumblr.com/

My son is learning to stand! He stood up 10 times during his...

Fri, 18 Mar 2011 16:29:00 -0400

My son is learning to stand! He stood up 10 times during his physical therapy, I’m so proud of him :’)

You’re such a miracle Skylar, you know that? I love you so much, and I’m so proud of you.

And fuck you Schizencephaly ;)

xoxo

Fri, 18 Mar 2011 13:39:24 -0400

Love you girl :)

how do you get your masks to come out so smooth? I know you clear coat it but there are no brush strokes!

Fri, 18 Mar 2011 13:39:14 -0400

I’m just that good ;)

But seriously- expensive paint brushes. I do the base coat 3 times. It’s a combination of good technique and great quality brushes.